Learning To Love Your Body

One of the things women seem to have the hardest time with is loving their bodies. We beat ourselves up, always finding something to criticize or be unhappy with. I have one friend who is constantly dieting and beating herself up if she slips up and eats a cookie one day. She doesn’t need to lose weight, but she is so afraid of gaining weight that she gives herself a huge guilt trip over every little thing.

I think she’s beautiful, but she finds a million tiny things to pick apart and feel bad about.

Unfortunately, my friend is just one example. The vast majority of women are unhappy with their bodies for one reason or another. Did you know that only 4% of women around the world believe they are beautiful? I don’t know about you, but I look around me every day and I see far more beautiful people than four percent.

Do you think you are beautiful? I'm still working on it, but I'm believing myself a little more every day.

When will we free ourselves from these oppressing standards of "beauty?"
Image: Shutterstock

The problem is that we are holding ourselves to unrealistic standards of beauty, and many women lack the self-confidence to believe in themselves and their beauty. 

Late last month, the New York Presbyterian/Weill Cornell Medical Center held a spring luncheon to benefit the hospital’s Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology. The luncheon was attended by New York “it” girls like Lauren Santo Domingo, Sofía Sanchez Barrenechea, and Fabiola Beracasa and hosted a panel discussion called “Mirror, Mirror on the Wall: A Conversation About Beauty and Self Image.”

The panel conversation included Dr. Gail Saltz and Dr. Amy Wechsler. “Today’s women are under extraordinary pressure to look physically beautiful and physically young in a way that, frankly, is inconsistent with real life,” said Saltz. “And they’re supposed to look that way while being the superwoman mom who takes care of her family and has a great career.”

So how do we, as women, start treating ourselves better?

In an interview with TODAY, Saltz said it all starts with loving your body—even if it isn’t perfect (whose is?). The trick is everything in moderation. “Rather than starving and exercising like mad I advocate eating sensibly and in a healthy way,” she says, “and learning new skills that are physical, yet suit your personality.”

Essentially, everyone is different. Yes, we all should be active, but it should be in a way we enjoy—why kill yourself doing exercise you hate every day? If running isn’t your thing, try something else, like yoga, dancing, golf, tennis, rock climbing, hiking, or any number of things.

“Spend a day adding up how many minutes you spend criticizing yourself and then ask yourself if there is some other way you would rather be spending that time,” Saltz advises.

What could you do with your extra time?

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Recognizing Anorexia Nervosa

I read an article today that made me incredibly sad. It was about a six-year-old little girl named Sophie, who developed anorexia in kindergarten. Kindergarten. She started restricting her portions of food more and more, exercised compulsively on the monkey bars, and even began throwing away her lunch and snacks at school.

And because the beginning stages of anorexia nervosa are not immediately physically apparent, no one knew. “She was slim, but not skeletal,” recalls her mother.

Be kind to your body. You'll only have one.

One night, Sophie told her mother about her problem, telling her, “Mommy, I have a problem… I am hungry all the time and I can’t eat. A voice in my head is telling me not to eat.” She was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa in the first grade, after not gaining weight for ten months straight and dropping from the 60^th percentile to the 19^thpercentile for her weight.

Sophie is eight now, and is doing well. Her parents got her treatment from a specialty center and continually monitor her eating at home and school. Sophie was also diagnosed with mild obsessive-compulsive disorder and anxiety.

I’ve always thought of anorexia as a mostly society driven problem; I knew that there was a psychological component to eating disorders, but I never realized that sometimes they can manifest without the individual even really understanding what’s going on. Sophie, at six, didn’t know why she felt she couldn’t eat.

Many people believe that eating disorders are a choice for individuals… but the truth is, I think it’s less of a choice than we realize. Anorexics can realize what’s going on, can fear for their life, can see that what they’re doing to themselves is wrong—but they can’t always stop doing it. And as a society, I think we could be a lot better at understanding that and being more supportive to those who suffer from eating disorders.

The girl with the eating disorder is often the last to know she is ill.
Becoming the new feminine ideal requires just the right combination of insecurity, exercise and anorexia.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, over 10 million Americans suffer from eating disorders, which have the highest mortality rate of any other psychiatric illness. But despite this, the thinspiration movement continues to grow online, promoting eating disorders as a way of life.

Anorexia isn’t always immediately visible to us, especially at the beginning. Many individuals who suffer from anorexia may never look like that skeletal image we hold in our minds, but that doesn’t mean it’s not there. Here are some of the behavioral signs and symptoms of anorexia:

• Obsession with food, weight, calories, dieting, or exercise
• Constant anxiety of gaining weight or being fat even when healthy or losing weight
• Refusal to eat with or around others
• Extremely self critical, anxious, depressed, or irritable. Is a perfectionist
• Self worth is determined by appearance and weight, loss of desire to engage in social relationships or activities

"You are imperfect, permanently and inevitably flawed.
And you are beautiful."
Image from Tumblr.com

I am certainly someone that values eating healthy, exercising, and generally being aware of overall health—but I hope that I’ve never given the impression that thinner is better, no matter the cost. Because it isn’t. We were all made differently, and more important than being “thin” or “skinny” is being healthy and happy.

Love yourself. Love your body—and be nice to it. You only get one.

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A Beautiful Pregnancy: Tips and Suggestions

Pregnancy changes a lot of things in women’s bodies. Hair and nails begin growing faster, along with the belly and breasts. Pregnant women are often described as having a “healthy glow,” and other physiological changes take place as well.

Because women’s bodies have to work so hard during pregnancy, it’s important to remember to allow for some pampering as well. That glowing look that we see on people like Kate Middleton, Lauren Santo Domingo, and Natalie Portman comes with its fair share of pampering—you can bet those ladies allow themselves to indulge sometimes. So why shouldn’t the average working woman do the same?

Tip #1: Moisturize skin everyday (be sure to use an all-natural moisturizer to avoid unhealthy chemicals!) and exfoliate one to two times per week. This will keep skin “glowing” and prevent splotches from showing up.  That healthy “glow” comes from the increased blood flow that comes with pregnancy.

Tip #2: Wear sunscreen. Not only will this protect baby from powerful UV rays, but it will also help prevent sunburns. Skin will be more sensitive during pregnancy, which means that even those who don’t often burn might still be at risk.

Tip #3: Enjoy your thicker, faster growing hair. Hair and nails will grow much faster and thicker than normal. Enjoy it while it lasts! Consider a new haircut or color (though if you dye your hair be sure to use vegetable-based dyes or only highlight).

Tip #4: Invest in a good bra. Your breasts will grow during pregnancy, and it will be much more comfortable for you if you invest in a new, supportive bra. Ideally, it should be well fitted and should keep your breasts from resting on top of your belly.

Tip #5: Get a massage. This is one of the most relaxing things you can do during pregnancy. However, be sure that your massage is by a trained massage therapist with a certification in pregnancy massage. Special equipment should be used to prevent pressure on the belly, and some essential oils and herbal body rubs should be avoided.

Tip #6: Have your nails done. Pedicures and manicures are a great way to get a little relaxation in. Be sure that tools are properly sterilized and there is ventilation to reduce toxic fumes. Just keep in mind that your nails are growing more quickly now, so consider light or clear colors that will be less noticeable when they grow out.

 Tip #7: Practice Prenatal Yoga. Doing so will strengthen, stretch, and relax your body.  It can also help keep energy levels up and encourages breathing techniques. Prenatal Yoga includes only poses that are appropriate and safe for every stage of pregnancy, from pre-conception to delivery.

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Natural Beauty: Olive Oil Spotlight

Ever wonder what natural products you can use to help with beauty? I hate putting chemicals on my hair and skin, so finding out about completely natural ways to cleanse my skin, wash my hair, and add to my daily routine always make my day a little better.

According to Lisa Drayer, RD, author of The Beauty Diet: Looking Great Has Never Been So Delicious, eating a diet rich in olive oil makes for less skin damage and wrinkling. Use it instead of vegetable oil when cooking or add it to bread instead of butter. Yum!

In fact, olive oil is so good for your skin that you can buy face cleansers made with water squeezed out of olives during processing. Extremely nourishing and super natural, L'Occitane En Provence Olive Tree Cleansing Milk couldn’t be much more nature-friendly.

Olive oil moisturizers can also be used to revive the skin around your eyes, which can often get puffy or develop bags. If your concern is other parts of your skin, there are also rich olive oil-based moisturizers packed full of vitamins available.

You can even get soaps packed with olive oil and olive leaf extract that make your skin soft and silky. If you need to exfoliate, try a body scrub in the shower. The olive oil in such scrubs will keep your skin from drying out and getting irritated like with so many other body scrubs that make skin feel tight and uncomfortable.

While I wouldn’t go around rubbing olive oil all over my body, I love that there are so many products out there that are composed with a mix of vitamins and oils that naturally occur in a simple food like olives.

If you are interested in purchasing some olive oil products, check out Health magazine’s list here.

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